I’m All for Just for Skipping Halloween [OPINION]
I know my hate mail column is going to burst at the seams for this, but I am happy it is going to rain on Halloween night. I hate Halloween. I just don't get it and I wish it would go away.
Besides being a gateway holiday for the Big Three, Halloween comes at a time when I have yet to mentally adjust to my world turning dead around me. I mean, one minute I am flip-flopping in cargo shorts under green leafy trees and the next, WHAM! Bare trees, dead leaves all over my property and 4:30 p.m. sunsets. It's the most terrible time of the year.
Even as a kid, I never got the logic of Halloween. So you dress up as something stupid and walk from house to house begging for candy. Really? My parents would spend a fortune on candy for other kids and complain whenever the doorbell rang because it was interrupting Batman or Lost in Space or something. We didn't have pause buttons or DVRs back in the day.
They could have saved a fortune by slipping me a few bucks, killing the lights and pretending that no one was home.
At least then we would go out around the neighborhood and only harass the people who knew who our parents were and where we lived. Today, parents load the kids in a van by the oodles full and drive them into neighborhoods they've never been before, all in the pursuit of even more candy than they could ever hope to consume in one lifetime. Greed is good, I guess.
Bah, humbug! I hate Halloween. I'm actually glad it's going to rain. Don't they have any good video games to play?
Barry Richard is the host of The Barry Richard Show on 1420 WBSM New Bedford. He can be heard weekdays from noon to 3 p.m. Contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org and follow him on Twitter @BarryJRichard58. The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the author.